By Scott Bishop
My 91-year-old mom recently passed away, and I wanted to discuss some of the administration steps that came up.
Health Care Power of Attorney – In my case, I was in CA, and my mom was in IL. I found the POA easy to provide documentation and effectively allowed me to communicate with the medical staff.
DNR – Do Not resuscitate / Advanced Directive – In my mom’s case, I thought it was generic and left a lot of room for interpretation by the agent (me, in my case). “I do not want my life to be prolonged, nor do I want life-sustaining treatment to be provided or continued if my agent believes the burdens of the treatment outweigh the expected benefits. I want my agent to consider the relief of suffering, the expense involved, and the quality as well as the possible extension of my life in making decisions concerning life-sustaining treatment.” Question – her heart rate was incredibly low and required a temporary pacemaker. The decision was made not to proceed with a permanent pacemaker. Was the temporary pacemaker going against her wishes? Is there a better, more definitive language you and your estate attorney could use to make it more clear to your agent?
Successor Trustee – What we typically see come in with revocable living trust assuming spouses are both trustees and beneficiaries during their lifetime. If one becomes incapacitated the other still have control as Trustee. In the event, they both become incapacitated the Successor TTEE (for example say adult Kid #1). In my family’s case, I was the successor TTEE. The unintended reality was both of my parents declined at about the same time and unfortunately, the week before my 99-year-old dad’s death in 2019 I had to take him and my elderly mom to the attorney’s office so they could “resign” as TTEEs of their trust.
What is the right way/time to trigger the successor TTEE? Is it best to have the TTEE resign? Prove medical incapacity?? Again, people say my parents have a living trust or I have a living trust. The implied assumption people make is everything is taken care of. How do you gracefully transition to the successor TTEE while the TTEEs are still alive without it feeling like crisis management?
Tax ID or Social Security number – typically we see the revocable trust is one of the TTEEs social security numbers. The challenge this creates at death is you cannot trade in a deceased SSN even if the account is titled in the name of the trust. In my parents’ case, when they resigned as TTEE we set up a tax ID for their trust other than my mom’s SSN along with a new account in the new tax ID. Then at her passing, we were still able to issue checks and make trades without delay. (If the trust were not in Mom’s SSN, we would be delayed waiting to open a new account in a Tax ID.
I share this story because handling the wishes of a loved one in addition to the administration of their estate at the end of life is rough. Even with a basic plan in place on a simple estate, there is a fair amount of administration. If you have elderly parents, I encourage you to have these tough conversations with them, and dial in the details so you can ensure their wishes are completely taken care of and you can spend your last moments with them not worrying about these things.
*This information is not intended to be substituted for individualized legal advice. Please consult your legal advisor regarding your specific situation.